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Jobs that are an utter Barsteward!

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propersplitbrainme

Warrant Officer
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Inspired by a couple of comments in another thread, thought I'd start this one.

Whats the biggest cnut of a job your aircraft type throws up at you?

For the Harrier I nominate the Fuel Flow Proportioner Hydraulic Motor and its infamous 4th nut. Infamous because it was (controvertially) frequently left off when fitting a replacement motor because it was so hard to get to. I'll swear that when Harriers are built, they suspend the FFP from the factory celing on a piece of string and then build the jet around it.
 
I admit that working on the c-130K means that there are virtually no real ****s of a job.

However there are some disgusting jobs that need to be done...such as emptying a bucket full of **** (which has normally been left to stew for a week or two). That to be honest is the worst job going on the C-130K, and it takes a strong stomach not to throw up when faced with that.
 
UnknownLiney said:
However there are some disgusting jobs that need to be done...such as emptying a bucket full of **** (which has normally been left to stew for a week or two). That to be honest is the worst job going on the C-130K, and it takes a strong stomach not to throw up when faced with that.
Click to expand...

Ughhh, yeah :PDT_Xtremez_34:
What about clearing the urinal drain tubes when they get blocked with calcified pee? GTC bleed air is used to create a jet-puimp effect which sucks the contents of the urinal overboard in flight. To clear blocked tubes:
Start the GTC
Put bleed air on
Get poly bag and stick finger over urinal drain exit under aircraft - Jet pump action stops and pressure builds up in drain tubes
Wait for a few seconds until GTC air pressure clears the blockage
Release finger and catch several days worth of stale urine in the poly bag.
Baaarfffff.

And watch out if you are in the freight bay when someones outside doing this, the back pressure from the GTC can cause a yellow fountain to appear out of teh blocked urinal.

How we laughed our way to the hepatitis clinic!
 
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Having to replace the HF Jennings relay on Pumas. Right down the thin bit of the tail boom. A right pig in the summer!
 
As I mentioned earlier I hated doing the nose u/c sequence valve on Nimrods. On Pumas I didn't really mind any jobs. I actually quite enjoyed doing AP pack changes. Merlin was just one pain in the arse job after another. A small job like changing a control rod balance spring could be a noz, but a windscreen cx was a piece of **** once you got one that fitted.
 
PSB,

Trying to find the 1/4" nut that some dullard of a leckie had dropped down the side of the engine on a Harrier. (It was twice as bad on a GR7A). Sooties to the rescue every time!
 
How about being the first person to change the hyd pipes on a QEC during a hyd flush, (130K), with engine installed. Everything back to front and working though those couple of panels.
 
CSDU cooling fan on the 'Rod. sometimes felt that breaking my forearm in several places would make reaching the top row of bolts SO much easier:PDT_Xtremez_35:
 
Tools required for csdu cooling fan cx, spanners various included cut down modified etc torch g.s and a large pack of ibuprofen to take the swelling down on yer arms after:PDT_Xtremez_34:
 
RHWR crate on Tonkas. Never done one myself, but over the years have heard alot of liney's go on about it.
 
Inlet anti-ice grenade valve on the mighty C130K is a pain in the tits.

However in my current state of employ teaching those of Arab decent is a nause.:PDT_Xtremez_09:
 
budgie said:
RHWR crate on Tonkas. Never done one myself, but over the years have heard alot of liney's go on about it.
Click to expand...

That's not a barsteward of a job just a pain in the ar5e because the tornado design team decided that zone 19 was a great place to put it as then any repetetive job encountered by those TG 1 spanner monkeys involved the phrase RHWR Crate Remove this was officially a TG1 task but being nice and helpful Av guys always took it out for them. The worst reason for removal for a triv task was footmotor replen..:PDT_Xtremez_25:
 
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Having worked on various aircraft I recon the Harrier beats anything around.
the hardest job on a Jag is easier than anything on a Harrier.

I challenge anyone to find a job worse than a Refuel valve on the Harrier with the engine and wing fitted!

To get access you remove a panel that is about 12" x 6", at the back of that is another panel about 3" x 3", remove that, this gives you access to the side of the tank.
The hole it comes out of is half the size of the valve. therefore you have to dismantle the thing whilst its in the jet and pull out the pieces.

then shove the new pieces in and rebuild it.

If the designer had put no panel there at all it would have been better.
 
enginesuck said:
Tools required for csdu cooling fan cx, spanners various included cut down modified etc torch g.s and a large pack of ibuprofen to take the swelling down on yer arms after:PDT_Xtremez_34:
Click to expand...
not forgetting Humour, A Sense Of!!
 
MCS jobs

MCS jobs

on the mighty F4, when we had to do Sonar Beacon checks, the beacon was behind a stress panel above the stabilator, drag a set of steps and a speed brace, undo around 100 non captive screws, press the button........beep. right do up all those panel screwsan hour to do a 2second job!:PDT_Xtremez_34:
 
I used to hate wirelocking the rear v band clamp on the rcs ducting in the harrier nosebay.
Tried a few times and never finished it off myself!!!

Anything on a Seaking is usually a pain in the ar5e. Westlands cant manufacture to tolerances so they shim everything the little monkeys!!!!!
 
Detail "X"

Detail "X"

A real tw*t of a job on that demon of the skies "The Jet Provost!" was wirelocking "Detail X". It was the connection of the hydraulic actuator to the steel wire cables that operated the undercarriage and a 'mare. You had to use a mirror and a mirror image drawing, with a combination of cross over, left handed and normal locking. Thankfully for me, I couldn't normally get access to it as there were some big sumpy bits in the way, but I not so fondly remember my SNEC "checking!" my efforts, with a pair of snips.
 
Sumpy wise on an Albert-Fuel nozzles (aka burners) to look at not a bad job but combine single hex nuts (always at the wrong angle to get a flats worth of turn on them) figure of eight double twist wire locking(done in the bay where they are fitted and then the engine is built round them) and no antiseize grease applied (so it all welds together) makes for a swearing fueled job.
They are a great contender for the old you can look at them or touch them but not at the same time!
 
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