Compassionate Discharge?

[KingGuin]

I'm following this thread with interest. I deal with similar almost daily and something doesn't quite ring true. Whether the OP has been treated unjustly or whether there is much more (and my money is on the latter) we shall have to wait and see.

 

[bigtexo]

I'm following this thread with interest. I deal with similar almost daily and something doesn't quite ring true. Whether the OP has been treated unjustly or whether there is much more (and my money is on the latter) we shall have to wait and see.

Sorry to disappoint you, there is nothing on latter,
However i've taken on some really good advice today from e-goaters, i.e. my pvr going in 6 weeks ago (has it been actioned or not and if so why not), saafa have been fantastic today so to all who have helped there comments are greatly appreciated.

And for the vultures you just keep them coming, be as cynical as you want. It's actually quite enjoyable to read!

 

[Noidea]

Look bigtexo, stop wasting everyone's time with this rubbish. Hardly anyone on here will give you decent advice when the detail is so constrained. Why not find out who on here are current Chf Clks, pm them, ask for their work number and speak to them about the whole situation, giving them the details and allow them to give some decent advice. So far you have caused 9 pages of largely drivel!

 

[SirSaltyHelmet]

Look bigtexo, stop wasting everyone's time with this rubbish. Hardly anyone on here will give you decent advice when the detail is so constrained. Why not find out who on here are current Chf Clks, pm them, ask for their work number and speak to them about the whole situation, giving them the details and allow them to give some decent advice. So far you have caused 9 pages of largely drivel!

He has as much right to post as you. If you dont like it don't read it.

 

[bigtexo]

He has as much right to post as you. If you dont like it don't read it.

thank you.

 

[gemarriott]

He has as much right to post as you. If you dont like it don't read it.

now you're giving me a headache! How do I know I don't like it if I don't read it?DT_Xtremez_42:

 

[SirSaltyHelmet]

Self licking lollypop Gem

 

[feckinG RANT]

I would need to double check, but I'm sure you can PVR even if you are DWR'd. You just can't use the PVR as means to get out of an OOA; but for you the OOA is a seperate issue to your PVR as you are not PVR'ing to get out of an OOA. Double check with you Chf Clk on that one. I've signed off on PVRs before for people who were going OOA and they were fully aware that would still be required to honour their OOA.

This is the problem, I think the OP doesn't want to do the OOA because of the situation with his wife, by PVR'ing alone he can't stop the OOA, it just pushes the out date back. So the OP has gone down the compassionate route to support his wife. Hence why I suggested that there may be other avenues such as preferential treatment, he may then not need to leave the RAF. Of course he may be a chancer but we can only go on what we are told on here.

Bigtexo, think long and hard about this, I presume you are an SAC? You've done 10 years, 2 to do till 12? You leave now you loose you lump sum (is it around £10000?), of course you may have no option but to leave now, but the RAF may be prepared to allow you to continue with a marker stopping you going OOA for a period of time (this will be determined when as part of the application for PT).

I think what Noidea is trying to say is speak to you Flt Cmdr/Chf Clk/SMO/Padre etc, cards on the table, tell them with maturity and respect what your issues are and what you would you feel would help you, and ask them what, if anything, can be done. Sliding scale:

1. Stay in with their support.

2. Leave via PVR avoiding the OOA.

3. Leave via other route avoiding OOA.

4. Medical (your mental health/stress etc) avoid OOA.

5. Do the OOA and then consider your options.

Assuming you have laid the facts bare on here, I see no reason why you shouldn't be able to get preferential treatment to avoid the OOA, at least for 1 year to 18 months. By which time you will be (I presume?) in the last 6 months of your 12 and you can leave, you will not pick up an OOA in the last 6 months. I'm a techie not an adminer so I may be wrong with this advice but from my 20 odd years of experience I would say you have a very good chance, if this is what you want of course.

 

[Drill Bit]

This is the problem, I think the OP doesn't want to do the OOA because of the situation with his wife, by PVR'ing alone he can't stop the OOA, it just pushes the out date back. So the OP has gone down the compassionate route to support his wife. Hence why I suggested that there may be other avenues such as preferential treatment, he may then not need to leave the RAF. Of course he may be a chancer but we can only go on what we are told on here.

I completely agree with what you are saying; I was just suggesting that it may be an easier and quicker route to exit by PVR'ing then tackling the OOA by reiterating that, given his circumstances, he would more likely than not prove to be an admin burden.

 

[SnoopPuppyPup]

And for the vultures you just keep them coming, be as cynical as you want. It's actually quite enjoyable to read!

OK, it seems to me that this is a case of wifey being happy for SAC Bloggs to bring home a wage day in and day out, but when he is asked to do one of the things that he is handsomely rewarded for she doesn't want to know.

Hundreds of personnel face this same problem on a daily basis, yet do nothing about it until its too late, and then the Air Force are left with the problem of picking up the pieces through whatever medium is appropriate when wifey reacts badly to an Assignment Order. If you know your wife/husband is unhappy being a service spouse, do something about it. If you don't do something, don't lay the problem at someone elses feet and then whinge that the airforce owes you this or that and try to worm your way out of the commitment.

 

[feckinG RANT]

OK, it seems to me that this is a case of wifey being happy for SAC Bloggs to bring home a wage day in and day out, but when he is asked to do one of the things that he is handsomely rewarded for she doesn't want to know.

Hundreds of personnel face this same problem on a daily basis, yet do nothing about it until its too late, and then the Air Force are left with the problem of picking up the pieces through whatever medium is appropriate when wifey reacts badly to an Assignment Order. If you know your wife/husband is unhappy being a service spouse, do something about it. If you don't do something, don't lay the problem at someone elses feet and then whinge that the airforce owes you this or that and try to worm your way out of the commitment.

Bit harsh mate, didn't the OP say his wife was suffering from a metal health issue? Bit different from "I don't want you to go just in case I need the batteries changing on the Sky remote..."

 

[Oberon305]

I think there are some selfish idiots on here. Yes, there are those who will do anything to get out of dets. I don't think from what I've read that the OP is one of these people. His spouse has mental health issues and is pleading with him not to go away. In his situation I'd do what I could to re-assure my spouse that she was more important to me than the RAF. Good for you mate, there are plenty of choppers who throw away marriages for want of another det or two to Vegas. Good luck, she's lucky to have you mate.

 

[bigtexo]

I think there are some selfish idiots on here. Yes, there are those who will do anything to get out of dets. I don't think from what I've read that the OP is one of these people. His spouse has mental health issues and is pleading with him not to go away. In his situation I'd do what I could to re-assure my spouse that she was more important to me than the RAF. Good for you mate, there are plenty of choppers who throw away marriages for want of another det or two to Vegas. Good luck, she's lucky to have you mate.

Cheers mucca, i read that last one and that guy clearly is one of those ones that reads a half story and believes he knows it all.

Money is not an issue to me, no i'm not minted, god i'm an SAC, but fortunate enought to have always owned my house, so doing another 2 years for £10000 would be very nice but not the end of the world. And because i live so far away from my house I think 2 years of commuting would be a bridge too far (for her and me).

I have been speaking to the Padre and SAAFA today again both have been fantastic, the Padre was very supportive, and the only person in the last 6-7weeks that has actually turned around and said that he will do everything to help. So whoever said padre on the posts i bow down to your knowledge!

And I enjoy the Air Force, and I hope people realise that but also my wife and kids will around longer than any job, and I enjoy being moaned at by 3 women!!!

Mental Health and depression is an illness, and people who want to slag me off please go and read up on CLINICAL DEPRESSION, its not a wipe your min*e and man the fu*k up. (i say this in a sincere tone, as i know people hold the stigma attached to the illness still)

 

[timaloy]

It's prob just a troll for an argument just keep on as you are and you square yourself away, family first, you can get a job anywhere just don't get out that quick that you can't make use of resettlement. I know its prob the last thing on your mind at the moment but don't squander that opportunity

 

[Soon To Leave]

Assuming you could cancel/defer the OOA, have you considered moving into AMQ's for a trial period to see if this improves your wife's condition?

Does your wife improve when you are on leave?

I'm just hoping you consider all options and giving up a reasonably paid job is your last resort.

Try getting all the help you can before making your final decision.

I hope you both have a happy outcome.

 

[bigtexo]

Thanks, we have thought about amq's long and hard but realistically it is not viable due to my 8 year olds schooling, she has been through nursery and primary school with all her close friends, the wife has really good support i.e. gp's/mental health. But I see where your coming fromDT_Xtremez_26:

She improves on leave because im hanging around like a bad smell, but yeah she does, she visibly relaxes knowing she doesn't have to mum and dad and I can take on the dad role for the time I am back.

Assuming you could cancel/defer the OOA, have you considered moving into AMQ's for a trial period to see if this improves your wife's condition?

Does your wife improve when you are on leave?

I'm just hoping you consider all options and giving up a reasonably paid job is your last resort.

Try getting all the help you can before making your final decision.

I hope you both have a happy outcome.

 

[Hu Jardon]

OK you have had ample opportunity on this thread to ask advice and listen to it or ignore it. When it has gone your way you have been happy and if anyone dare criticise anything you say then they you slag them off and if the overall sympathy begins to wain you add yet another piece of information to your sad but juicy tale. So if you can't behave and refrain from foul language in what is after all a public area of our forum then I will put my moderators hat on and close it or move it to the pigs bar. You choice

 

[bigtexo]

OK you have had ample opportunity on this thread to ask advice and listen to it or ignore it. When it has gone your way you have been happy and if anyone dare criticise anything you say then they you slag them off and if the overall sympathy begins to wain you add yet another piece of information to your sad but juicy tale. So if you can't behave and refrain from foul language in what is after all a public area of our forum then I will put my moderators hat on and close it or move it to the pigs bar. You choice

do what you wish, i was cleary exercising my right to to give my opinion about the poster, just like he did to me. and also if you want to be a moderator, then moderate not opinionate i.e. again why should i allow you to say that i am drip feeding information and not come back and defend myself.
my minimal information at the start was to find the ap and nothing more but when people who rightly so said i was hiding something, i gave more information because i believed and felt comfortable that there people wanting to help, so i did and the majority have.
its unfortunate to see that some people are trolling, which i believe is against e-goat rules? have they had a warning or the posts removed?

 

[chiprafp]

Initial post answered on many occasions now and due to personal attacks this thread is being locked.