Jobs that are an utter Barsteward!

[fat lazy techie]

On C130K I reckon it was the burners too, only 8 of them but they were wirelocked too ffs.

I think you will find it is only 6 my good man. You have been away from the klassik for too long, come back over to the dark side. I can agree that they can be a right pain to change though, even when you are as good as me at them.

 

[Rigga]

Just winding back the years a bit......

1. Whirlwind Intermediate Gearbox Mounting Bolts (bottom of the Tail Pylon - Two Bolts each side) Wirelocked together in a 1" hole about three inches deep - Had to be done with a Twizzle Stick (Anyone remember them?) - I still have one.

2. Whirlwind Lower Gearbox Mounting Brackets - You had to assemble the mounts on the Tube-ends, Drill the Split-Pin Holes and lock the Bolts all at the same time! And in a gaping hole 18" deep through a 22"x22" access panel at knee height - Doesn't sound too bad - but try doing it! Then you had to install a 24" 80lb Gearbox into the same place. Try holding that up for a few mintues while your mate tries to find the nut he just dropped!

3. Buccaneer Bomb Door Micro-switches - through a small panel just 6" away from where you needed it!

4. Bucc again - BLC Ducts - 4" to 7" dia SS Tubes about 3 thou thick - just waiting for you to dent them as you prise them apart to get the last "Conner" Seal in.

 

[Get Tae]

Bucc again - BLC Ducts - 4" to 7" dia SS Tubes about 3 thou thick - just waiting for you to dent them as you prise them apart to get the last "Conner" Seal in.

Wrapping lashing tape around and getting 4 other riggers to stand on the tape to get the pipe to line up was one of our methods on 208, didnt work all the time though!!!

What about a tail pfcu cx where you had to drill 40 odd jo bolts out of the access panel before you even got access????

 

[Scaley brat]

Putting the final hi-shear pins in inside a Phantom speedbrake. 1/2 inch block of steel, didn't have the luxury of incanol back then and you had a half inch of space behind the block over the top of the hi-shear pin tails from the other side.
For those of you who never had the pleasure, this means you have 2mm from the top of your nail to the business end of a set tail and you could only set them with a swan neck rivetting hammer on full trigger..... I admit it had me in tears more than once.

Also wire locking the heat jacket thingy on the rear nozzle box on a GR7, especially when your Chief won't let you do it the easy American way (Single strand) and insists you do it with 1 piece of wire (25 twists to the inch) and snips it off cos he says it's to loose. Cheers Pete, DT_Xtremez_28:

Oh yes and drilling the bolt in an ADV Chaff & Flare "cheese wedge" with a 1.2mm HSS drill bit at 6 in the morning on a saturday

 

[marisan]

RNZAF,
Replacing the external Canopy Jettison Cartridges in a Skyhawk

No safety pin (no room to remove), 6 inches of bendy cable on one end with a ball swage at the end just waiting to be snagged. The gas vent in the palm of your hand and up to your elbow in hydraulic lines looking for a one inch hole that you couldn't see and that you had to push said six inches of bendy cable through. Scarey.

Strikemaster Canopy Jettison Jacks. First put the detent in, then the spring (Really strong spring) Then the retaining button. Easy so far. The split pin had to be placed THROUGH the retaining button from the cockpit wall side. Bloody BAC

 

[Weebl]

4. Bucc again - BLC Ducts - 4" to 7" dia SS Tubes about 3 thou thick - just waiting for you to dent them as you prise them apart to get the last "Conner" Seal in.

Don't forget slicing your fingers and thumbs wide open on aforementioned razor sharp seals.

I used to look like an Emo with severe depression by the time I had finished rebuilding the complete BLC system on a major.

 

[propersplitbrainme]

Now that this thread's come back to life....DT_Xtremez_14:

I remember doing the para door counterweight spring on the C130K, a job that required a bit of respect for that enormous clock spring that you had to 'wind up' and then grip with a G-clamp to stop it unwinding while you fitted it. If the clamp slipped off the spring could have yer arm off!

 

[Penguins Suck]

listen in your pruperspitblow. evan i no it called a negator spring, and I an amm. yous must be thik as mints

 

[Hu Jardon]

listen in your pruperspitblow. evan i no it called a negator spring, and I an amm. yous must be thik as mints

Fcuking class

It's posts like this that make me come back

Kevin/Dale you are one class act - have you ever thought of making a Docu Soap?

 

[John Lloyd]

Fcuking class

It's posts like this that make me come back

Kevin/Dale you are one class act - have you ever thought of making a Docu Soap?

Or a docu soapy t1t w@nk?

 

[ady eflog]

How about a VC10 slat rail spyglass split pin? you can just say feel it yet alone see it.

 

[propersplitbrainme]

listen in your pruperspitblow. evan i no it called a negator spring, and I an amm. yous must be thik as mints

Guilty as charged DT_Xtremez_31:

And thanks for the refresher on herc door parts DT_Xtremez_30:

 

[dumbsumpy]

What about 6 tank pump cx in-situ on the Canberra PR9?

1. Take off strap panel and squeeze into 6inch gap
2. Take off 6-squillion bolts,
3. Split pump in half, put new pump on panel,
4. Panel back on with 6 squillion bolts that you 'forgot' to label where they came from,
5. Watch and laugh maniacally as your carefully PRC'd cork gasket splits into three and lets all the fuel out.
6. Go to 2.

 

[Sospan]

2 hardest jobs I have had by a mile is a VC10 BCV change, a absolute bitch of a location with 8-10 major hyd pipes that needed locking.

And the winner! Was a Jag fin change, quick job, well about 3 days! It was easier to demand the next Assembly up (Whole aircraft).

 

[185]

lightning number 2 ecu servo bleed connect and wire lock,ive still got the scars,or no 1 reheat drains,or no 1 ecu hyd pumps.try changing atgb or dc/ac geney.all in all the lightning was a barstwerd for all trades

 

[MontyPlumbs]

TIALD pod fit on Harrier - 'nuff said.

 

[Spearmint]

Fatigue Monitoring Computer on any Harrier. Just because those lovely designers over at British Waste Of Space decided to have it mounted right up at the top inside the rear fuselage above 60R /60L.

If your hands are any bigger than Jeremy Beadles right one, you've got **** all chance of unplugging the ******* thing.

Worst thing is the Fatigue mod is being installed in a fair few more airframes due to us (Hot Poop) trying to keep the one man one fan carbon fibre death provider flying until 2023.

Oh and the AP reference for changing it is a bloody laugh and all.

1) Simply remove Door 61 and climb up and over every LRU to get to the FMC. DT_Xtremez_35:

 

[sooty power]

For me its got to be connecting the cell nine drain in the rat bay on f3s or replacing the upper wing box drain hoses, especially as there is no mp. just make sure you go to stores and get a spare elbow and extendable fingers fitted to ypur arms.

 

[Trembling Scumbag]

On the mighty F3, Rudder swivels are a pain in the arse. but even worse is the wirelocking on the NLG/NWS selector valves. Nightmare doesnt come close!!!!

 

[Ex-Bay]

Changing the AYF altimeter tri-set in the Canberra PR7. The set itself was no problem, but the switch & display in the cockpit required being upside-down reaching into a dark narrow space full of cables & pipes.